Manipulators are willing to do anything to get their way. How do you stop responding to them? First, find out what phrases are typical to achieve their goals and don’t listen to them anymore.

Manipulators are soul-sucking people who drain your energy and threaten your mental health. Manipulative people only think about one thing: how to benefit themselves. They give little thought to how their behavior affects others. Five common phrases of manipulators that you shouldn’t fall for were told by a psychologist.

1 Look what I did because of you!

This is one of the key phrases manipulators use. It’s an excuse for not being in control of their actions. They want you to think that you are the cause of their behavior. This phrase can be especially annoying when the manipulator has done something to punish you for a perceived insult.

Manipulators especially like this phrase because it can be used to control other people and has a special place in their arsenal of psychological tricks. This manipulative statement is easy to deconstruct. Unless you have a gun to someone’s head, you don’t have the power to make anyone do anything. People make their own choices. The reason people blame others for their actions rather than their feelings is because in their minds feelings and actions are one. For example, many people with anger will respond to anger by punching walls or breaking objects around them. Then they will say that whatever made them angry made them do it. This is because in their minds their anger and their reaction to it are one.

2 I said I was sorry, what more do you want!

People tend to use this phrase when they feel someone is shaming them, usually a romantic partner. People who use this phrase are usually men who are fed up with their girlfriend or wife’s desire to repeatedly talk about the conflict. The feeling that inspires these words is legitimate irritation. After all, if you’ve done something wrong and you’ve already apologized, it’s exhausting to be reminded of that wrong over and over again. But the phrase is still manipulative because it implies that after the apology, the aggrieved party has nothing more to desire. Rather than viewing the other person’s hurt feelings as irritation, healthy responses recognize the importance of the emotional experience.

3 Don’t be dramatic!

Every time someone shames you about an emotional experience, they are manipulating you. That doesn’t mean that people never get upset irrationally. Everyone has hot-button issues that make them mad or sad. But when faced with that situation, a person with healthy communication habits won’t give up on your emotional experience. That’s what’s important here. Telling someone they are overreacting is shaming them.

4 You always do!

When a manipulator says these words, one of two things happens: your “stubbornness” interferes with what they wanted, or they are trying to plant the seeds of insecurity and guilt. Exaggerations are a tool they use when they want to appear better than you. Most likely, “You always do this…” – is their way of saying, “You keep me from doing what I want to do.”

5 I didn’t say that!

Confusing and confusing others with their words is a masterful skill of the typical manipulator. They also want to make people think they are being ridiculous by contradicting what they say. When they keep doing this, you get a sense of insecurity, and you begin to doubt yourself.

The next time you come across any of these phrases and recognize a manipulator in action, don’t take anything personally.